He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize