How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
