Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Randomize
