the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
