i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
