Kiss
Puke
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
