Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
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