i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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