Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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