my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize