areolas are like halos for boobs.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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