YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Randomize
