When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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