1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
