69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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