my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize