I wish my penis had an off switch
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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