I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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