im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
