How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
