you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
