I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
either way he was missing a nipple.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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