I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
