dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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