so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
