thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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