it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Randomize
