hotel room ftw
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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