Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Boobs speak an international language.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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