Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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