i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize