you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
