btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
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