jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Fuck appropriateness.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Randomize