help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
