Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
