I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
third nipple confirmed
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
He shit in the fireplace
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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