Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
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