you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
