there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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