I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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