from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
