Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
