I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
My ass is underappreciated
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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