I think i sorta joined a cult last night
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
