I am puke
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize