Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
