quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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