He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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