I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
